Tuesday, September 14, 2010

tears in the heart

August was such a stressful month with me...a lot of things have transpired, good and bad...pleasant and unpleasant...this was the time when i was confined at the hospital for 5 days...i am still recovering now and hope that i can fully recover...lately, i feel so exhausted and i think i really need a break...i need a vacation and i need a rest, both physical and emotional..so tired...i can't express what i am feeling now but words can never describe the turmoil that is going on inside me...even if i pour down all my tears and drain my eyes from it, there are still tears in my heart that never reach my eyes...

how then am i going to stop these tears inside? the pain is excruciating and it's eating me up, consuming my system, my being, my existence...i wish i could go far...far away from this pain but even then, i can never evade from it because wherever i go, i will always carry this pain because the pain is ME...it's within..it's inside of me, so how can i run away from it?

time is my friend but isn't even cooperative lately...time is so mean, taking away my precious seconds and milliseconds..don't i have the right to be happy even for a moment? time, i am waiting and i am willing to wait until there is no more reason to wait..