Literary Criticism (English 29)
Try to look into this situation and analyze it yourself..then speak up for someone in this situation...
At 18,Nicole was madly and deeply in loved with Chad, who was a year older than her, and Chad said he was too, with Nicole. Nicole was expressive and outspoken of her emotions for Chad unfortunately, Chad was sort of reserved and was showing disinterest in the relationship but he assured Nicole that he does love her.
He gives extra reasons for spending less time with her. Work is involved, family, studies and all the reasons in the world that every sane and sensible man could ever fabricate. No matter how much Nicole tried to absorb in her mind and heart that her man does really love her, she could not feel it inside.
This went on for 3 years. Nicole kept trying to preserve and hold on to the relationship because she values the time with him, the feelings for him and the relationship with him, considering that they have been together for 4 years before tying the knot.
They were engaged, yes. They have been engaged on their first year anniversary. Such a grand celebration and a romantic event for both of them. But the following years, the engagement seemed to disappear in thin air. Still, Nicole loved Chad as always however, whatever she was feeling inside was not compensated. Nicole was born to be a fighter. She told herself that she's going to hold on no matter what happens. Then wedding came. They were wedded on their 4th year anniversary.
On their 5th year in the realtionship and 1st year in marriage, she bore him a son before Chad decided to work abroad. Nicole saw the same passivity in him. But monetary wise, she was well-provided and the boy. But for Nicole, Chad's love was more important to her than any material thing. He lavished him with gifts and presents everytime he comes home but he could not feel Chad's presence even when she's holding his hands.
One day, out of the blue, she realized that the relationship was already dying and she feared that it will die a natural death. The gap between them has grown wider and deeper and Nicole couldn't help but break down. Nicole really loves him and she knew she would still fight for him but she felt that there was no point of battling for him. She felt all alone and no assurance was ever laid for her.
If you were Nicole, what will you do? if you were Chad, will you remain passive and unmindful of Nicole's dilemma? If you were Nicole or Chad, will you keep the relationship? Will you hold on to your marriage? Will you hold on for each other?
34 comments:
...As for me...if I were Nicole or Chad...it would be better to talk personally about the problem...if that's the situation, their son will be the one who'll be affected a lot.. they should try to have some heart 2 heart conversation just for the sake of the child...but since it is so obvious that the feeling's are fadin' then, they should try to make things up for the good of both sides...i think that Nicole is a strong person since it was stated there that she is born to be a fighter so i think she knows how to handle the situation but of course with the help of Chad in such a way that there will be no hearts to be stepped upon...again...it will probably denotes the saying "let infatuation die a natural death and give birth to true love when its time..." something like that because i think they are pre-distined lovers...they know how to handle the situation that would make their relationship become stronger, perhaps, if they decided to continue.
Therefore, I can say that they can have a stronger relationship because they have build a strong foundation...its just a matter of giving enough TIME, EFFORT, and TOTAL COMMITMENT...to make it more romantic...:))
>>>i love the story indeed!! :)
MARICRIS O. MABAO
BSED 3
Lit-Crit
Actually, me and Nicole have the same line of emotion or feelings toward the guy we love. I was deeply move her experience because we have the same experience but not on the marriage part because I am not yet engage or married.
If I were in the situation of Nicole, I will confront the man I love. I will ask him whats wrong and why as far as what I observed, why he keep on to be passive. What is the reason behind his passivity in our relationship.
If I were Chad, I will not remain passive but open of what I feel for Nicole. Open of my feelings toward her and understand her feelings toward me.
If I were Nicole or Chad I would still continue the relationship we had especially that we already have our child to care and love. The four years of relationship bears sentimental value.
I would still hold on to our relationship for each other especially our sacred marriage.
I will not be blind but considerable.
Actually, me and Nicole have the same line of emotion or feelings toward the guy we love. I was deeply move her experience because we have the same experience but not on the marriage part because I am not yet engage or married.
If I were in the situation of Nicole, I will confront the man I love. I will ask him whats wrong and why as far as what I observed, why he keep on to be passive. What is the reason behind his passivity in our relationship.
If I were Chad, I will not remain passive but open of what I feel for Nicole. Open of my feelings toward her and understand her feelings toward me.
If I were Nicole or Chad I would still continue the relationship we had especially that we already have our child to care and love. The four years of relationship bears sentimental value.
I would still hold on to our relationship for each other especially our sacred marriage.
I will not be blind but considerable.
Charlyn A. Acenas
BSED-3
Lit-Crit
If I were Nicole, I will approach Chad and talk to him, because what is lacking or missing in their relationship is a constant communication and a follow up about their personal feelings with each other and about the situation. There is a need to talk to clear things out. After how many years of trying hard to save the relationship, Nicole feels like Chad don’t love her that much or doesn’t love her at all. The same feelings I felt six years ago when I had my first boyfriend. He courted me for more than one year but the relationship last only for seven months. The same with Chad, he is not that expressive. I see myself in the character of Nicole. It feels like he doesn’t love me that much. I kept on reminding my boyfriend that if ever we have a problem, we should settle things out. But he seems so relax and don’t bother to answer me seriously and it was repeated several times. He knows me well that when I already decided something, for an instance, breaking up with someone, I will no longer turn back my head again for him. I decided to break up with him and he cried, begging for a second time. That was the time, I felt and proved that he really love me. He proved it, he eat his pride and cry in front of me. But I already made my decision and it is already final. The only problem is misinterpretation because I thought he don’t really love me. It’s just that he is not that kind of an expressive guy.
If I were Chad, I won’t stick to an attitude that would only bring no good to my family and to my relationship with Nicole. I will talk to her and ask forgiveness for being so apathetic. There should be a balance to show our love to our love one. Not only in action but it should also be expressed in words and be visible in our facial expression that I am happy to have her in my life and how grateful I am to have a wonderful child with her. I will consider the fact that women have emotional needs which they wanted somebody to make them feel special, important, and to be treated with so much love and affection.
Using the reader’s response approach, if I were one of them, all of my answer would be yes. I will keep the relationship, I will hold on to our marriage, and I will hold on for each other because there is nothing big in their problem and there is no reason for me not to fight and hold on for it. Chad became a good provider to Nicole and to his child. But he misses to express it in words and show it with care and affection. Love won’t last with just material support only. Love should be nourish and should be shared by two people involve. Their relationship won’t last if there is only one person who really gives her effort for the relationship to work. It should be both of the people involve must fight for it if they really want it to survive. They need a constant communication because without communication in a relationship, it won’t really last and it will die in a natural death. And even if one day those material things provided by Chad were gone, but if love is still there, the relationship will still survive, because love can survive without material possession. The unconditional love is the most important thing of all which includes oratory ability, prophecy, knowledge, faith, philanthropy and hope.
Love is something to express and not something to be kept within. I know there is still a hope for it to last. There is only a minor problem that should be addressed immediately. When you love someone, there should be an honest conversation about your feelings and share it with him/her and with God as the center of the relationship.
Ceres B. Flordeliz
AB. English 4
i like the story of Nicole and Chad. If I were Nicole it will be better if they will give some time to talk about what she feels towards his husband,Chad.A heart 2 heart conversation would help them. They must talk about it because time will come that their son will be affected about their problems. I know that we girls,we like that boys must be like this and like that,that they should say the words "i love you" every time we need to hear it but boys usually show their love in providing us all we need. They should talk about it,their must be a misunderstanding and less communication.
JANE MARIE AGNES J. PEREZ
If I were Nicole, I should talk to Chad and express whatever feeling I have because a relationship without interaction and communication will not work the way the person wanted it to be. It is not an excuse that if one is not that vocal then that person could not let the person he loves feel that she is wanted and loved by him. It is also not advisable that we bypass
situations since if one experience the same problem and if it is not solved then problems will follow and will get worst afterwards. it is not good to keep burdens inside. we as humans need to let it out, sometimes, cry it out loud because there are different types of people so we should also consider how we approach a person. we should not be confident that the other person loves us for LOVE is never enough for someone to stay. It needs time, communication, efforts, understanding, patience, sacrifices, courage and prayers for the relationship to be fruitful. Love is both an action and a feeling. The action of love generates a blissful feeling called by the same name. When the action stops, the blissful feeling is replaced with pain. that's what Nicole felt the love was replaced with pain when Chad acts like he doesn’t love Nicole that much. When we love the person, we should Say it. When we say the words "I Love You", they should carry with them the desire to show someone that we love them, not what we simply want to feel. When we say it, make sure we really mean it and are willing to do anything for that special person. words are not enough it must have actions to let the person see and feel how much the person loves him. we should Empathize. Put ourself in someone else's shoes. Rather than impose one's expectations or attempt to control them, to understand how they feel, where they come from, and who they are. Realize how they could also love you back just as well. in this case, Chad should emphatize and should not remain passive and unmindful in Nicole's Dillemma. It should also be considered that there are emotional needs of women that a man should cope up.In their case, we must not judge or put the blame to chad for being passive because it is also Nicole's fault for she let the years bypass by not telling Chad about her feelings in their relationship.Expect nothing in return. That doesn't mean we should allow someone to mistreat or undervalue us. It means that giving love does not guarantee receiving love. Try loving just for the sake of love. Realize that someone may have a different way of showing his or her love for you; do not expect to be loved back in exactly the same way. so maybe Chad shows his love by providing nicole and his son everything. He lavished her with gifts and presents everytime he comes home but he could not feel Chad's presence even when she's holding his hands. because the expectation of the other was material things are not important to her but for chad it is one way of showing something for her. Two people could never be the same, there will always be a difference but the love binds us, we should Realize that the relationship can be lost. If we realize that we can lose the one we love, then we have a greater appreciation of what we have. Think how lucky we are to have someone to love..I will keep the relationship since marriage is
a social contract between two individuals that unites their lives legally, economically and emotionally. so with this definition Chad lacks the emotional aspect in providing his wife the emotional needs. I will keep the relationship since i love the guy if i were Nicole. and also for the sake of the child since he will be affected sooner or later as he grow up since in this world, we are surrounded with the criticisms of others..
Mary Lalainne Q. Pacto
A.B English 4
Lit.crit.
People would tend to be very rational that they start complicating things to make things easier for other people to understand or comprehend. However, they usually fail in their mission of making life easier instead they would make things more complicated and other people become very irrational on the way they react on the given situation. Life has never been easy. If people would just go straight to the point of what they feel or what they think is right, it could have lessen the problems of the latter. Love has never been complicated; it is the people who are very complicated to love.
We, humans, are very imperfect beings yet we have the God-given power to make our lives and others meaningful. Nicole has her choice, and she took the one which she thought would be the best choice of her life. It is spectacular to think that Nicole fought for what she thought was right yet she failed to see the bigger picture- she was not seeing Chad's love for her clearly. She should have considered the fact that Chad was NOT compensating the love she has given him. Too much optimism in this unequal world is never effective; instead it would make the situation even worse. She should have considered the consequences she might get after marrying Chad.
But I can never put all the blame to Nicole. I even think that everything that happened between them is all Chad's fault. One can never blame the other for loving him/her. Everybody is entitled to love somebody. I have been in these complicated situations that I need to decide right away. However, it is not easy. Considering the idea that a girl would love me to the risk of crossing rivers and mountains is already a one-in-a-million opportunity for me to have a fresh start especially if a person has always been torn apart by his past experiences of love. Suffering from having a broken, damaged heart might also be a factor for the inadequate giving of love to others. Actually, the biggest conflict of the story was that if Chad did not love Nicole that much or he did not love her at all, he should not have taken Nicole's hand for marriage. Marriage is a sacred act yet most of the people only think of it as for compliance or legality purposes. He should've told Nicole that he did not love her instead leaving everything to chances.
Love is there, it is always there. It will only depend on how people, how we express it.
George Mikhail H.K. Pagalan
AB English - 4
The story is about a girl who used to be strong and positive minded and who is deeply in loved with a guy named Chad but in the end she begins to loose hope and later became more confuse with their relationship.
If I were Nicole I must be mentally, emotionally and physically prepare myself for this situation. I must try to talk and work things out if possible with Chad because we are married and we have a child and at the same time I must be ready to face the consequences if ever things are not to turn out great between us. If I were Chad I must also try to check and be sensitive enough to know the feelings of my wife, if I am making her happy or sad because of my actions. I must also fulfill her emotional needs and spend time with her because life doesn’t only revolve on material things it needs love to survive. If I were Nicole or Chad we must save the relationship and fix it as soon as possible because they are not the only one affected with this situation they should both think about the future of their child. We must be able to distinguish what is the problem with our relationship. We must also be able to identify what went wrong and why is this happening? And most importantly what can we do about it? We must find answers and identify possible solutions to our problem. We must also remember that when you give your heart to someone, you’re not only giving that person the right to love you back but also the power to hurt you. So it is normal to be hurt sometimes, but at the end of the day the power of love and forgiveness must prevail. If there is still love we must hold on for each other until the end. We must never let go.
Marie Dawn Nebrea
BSED-2
Lit-Crit
true love as they say. if i were nicole, i wont insist myself if chad really dont want to continue the relationship. because for more 5years it was only nicole who held on for so long just to stay with chad. love cannot grow if they dont have enough communications. it was only nicole who strive hard for them to survived. human as we are, for sure we can be patient but days months and years can wait, but not forever. nicole shoudnt insist herself to chad if chad doesnt like her anymore.
she deserves someone better than chad, better what chad can give to her. having a baby is not an assurance that love will last. though chad, loves nicole but not letting nicole know how he feels then its useless. actions speak louder than words. its not easy to be taken for granted. though its not what chad feels but thats how nicole is receiving from chad. but chad, is so lucky to have nbicole becuase even if chad is not showing how much he loves nicole, nicole never leaves him.
"One advantage of marriage is that, when you fall out of love with him or he falls out of love with you, it keeps you together until you fall in again."
I believe in destiny that I deem marriage as a lifetime quest. So if you are still in the stage of choosing your partner you can be meticulous as much as you want because it is in this genuine choice that you draw your future and lifetime fate. So whatever change may occur in your marriage you will really put an effort to save your relationship.
Marriage and special relationship is by far different for me. If the story is only about a girl who is in confusion and agony with his boyfriend's sudden change then without a doubt I would take her shoe by choosing to end the relationship. However, this is not the case though, the story is in more serious situation and should be dealt with deeper. If I were Nicole, I will open a conversation with Chad to discuss and fix things that might have been bothering him in my fullest understanding and patience for the sake of our child and mine. This view is from my personal belief not based in an experience for neither I have got married nor enter in a relationship. It may not be good for a woman to be suffering from his husband’s actions but I guess being strong to save one’s family would be the greatest achievement of a wife or a husband.
The author has perfectly echoed the most prevalent problem of married couples in the society. She seems to be an eyewitness of someone or many other people’s stories similar to this because the idea of the story really generates flame that goes to illustrate how it exemplifies realism. Also, the phrases that she used in the text are so exact that it helped me as a reader to notice the sudden change of mood and situations of the story. Clear use of the language was really observed. Moreover, the choice of simple words are just perfect for the readers to be attached and easily relate to the concept and to the flow of the story. I love how the author left the ending hanging so the readers can have more interaction and think of their own views about it which just shows how she cares about the readers in this light.
"One advantage of marriage is that, when you fall out of love with him or he falls out of love with you, it keeps you together until you fall in again."
I believe in destiny that I deem marriage as a lifetime quest. So if you are still in the stage of choosing your partner you can be meticulous as much as you want because it is in this genuine choice that you draw your future and lifetime fate. So whatever change may occur in your marriage you will really put an effort to save your relationship.
Marriage and special relationship is by far different for me. If the story is only about a girl who is in confusion and agony with his boyfriend's sudden change then without a doubt I would take her shoe by choosing to end the relationship. However, this is not the case though, the story is in more serious situation and should be dealt with deeper. If I were Nicole, I will open a conversation with Chad to discuss and fix things that might have been bothering him in my fullest understanding and patience for the sake of our child and mine. This view is from my personal belief not based in an experience for neither I have got married nor enter in a relationship. It may not be good for a woman to be suffering from his husband’s actions but I guess being strong to save one’s family would be the greatest achievement of a wife or a husband.
The author has perfectly echoed the most prevalent problem of married couples in the society. She seems to be an eyewitness of someone or many other people’s stories similar to this because the idea of the story really generates flame that goes to illustrate how it exemplifies realism. Also, the phrases that she used in the text are so exact that it helped me as a reader to notice the sudden change of mood and situations of the story. Clear use of the language was really observed. Moreover, the choice of simple words are just perfect for the readers to be attached and easily relate to the concept and to the flow of the story. I love how the author left the ending hanging so the readers can have more interaction and think of their own views about it which just shows how she cares about the readers in this light.
->Johayra Joy Gee-Jay Gandawali Macasindil Pangandaman
woman have great instinct; they possess the adjective word intuition... and woman Were great in sensing the situation they know that there is something wrong.
like the story of Nicole and chad; a real to life story of a man and a woman having a conflict in their relationship.
-->As for chad: he is the kind of a man who cant move, who cant make decision because obviously he is afraid of hurting Nicole his wife.but yea like a passive he doesn't know that his wife is hurting inside and he is one of those guy who give everything to please there woman in giving such material thing because they think that all woman love in fancy thing. Well! such a man of a good heart, a man who have consciences for a woman who really madly in-love to him. (but still a woman cant please of anything such material things in the word;for a woman couldn't be please of anything but LOVE.)
-->as for Nicole: she's definitely awesome!! a girl who is a sole fighter? a girl who fight for her love? a girl that will do everything just to save the relationship? she 's like a soldier in the battle field but like a strong soldier, a soldier know how, when to fight and when to surrender and that is Nicole.
-->for the story: there is really something wrong from the start of the relationship the character of Nicole definitely not the character of woman does chad want him to be his girl. for shes somewhat like an aggressive girl who is vocal in her feelings."take note" some may like that kind of character but some may don't like. there are some boys dont want their girl to be like that, that is why their love is no longer the same as from the start(nakulangan nah!;))
but the question is why chad keep assuring that he really love Nicole? why he keep the relation still on? when in fact he doesnt show interesting in it anymore.
--> if i were Nicole definitely I'll do what i think is right for both of us(my partner)... i'll make decision that benefit the two of us, even if the decision hurt me so much that it feels like ending my life in vain. because i cant stay in the situation where i know i am the only one standing and the other one obviously dont want to get up and make the effort to stand the fix the problem that is invincible to see but visible in the eye of the heart.
I'll to talk to my partner because he is involve in the problem ofcourse!,, but probably in that time i already have my plan; plan A discussing to him about the situation, if there is still the chance to continue for child sake and of course because i love him... then plan B. im ready to give-up something more important than my life.. but i have to carry on because i still have my reason to stand and face the cruelty of life which is my child.
Fijo, Marizza "yza" G.
AB. English-4
litcrit
Trust, time, honesty, communication and loyalty are components of love and relationship...without them I guess love is useless and relationship won't succeed. In relationship it's not enough that only one will fight it should be both. A one sided relationship will surely fail.
I admire Nicole for being so brave..I can't believe she survive for 5 years in that kind of relationship..and I can't imagine myself to be in that situation. When we love, make sure to love our self first...you are not capable of loving someone if you don't know how to love yourself. We should left something to our self so that if our someone special will leave us, we can move on and live again simply because we love our self.
Communication is very much important in a relationship. And it is so obvious that Nicole and Chad don't have this. Having a communication makes my past relationship longer. I am the kind of person who will not just keep quiet when I am hurting. I always tell the people I love the things that can hurt me or if what he is doing makes me hurt. Nicole should tell Chad what she felt about their relationship. She should not keep quite and endure all the pain. She should have done this along time ago..when they are not yet married. She should have told her about her fears, pain and needs. She should have told Chad about his mistakes and what he had failed to do. She should have told him frankly that if she really love her then show it, let her feel it and if not then let her go because she's dying in pain because of what he is doing. In short. They need a heart to heart to talk.
If I were Chad...he should be honest to Nicole, if he love her he should show it. Chad should give time to Nicole and his son. Words is not enough, action is not enough in showing our love, it should be both. He should give the emotional needs of Nicole. I guess he loves Nicole because he marry her. A guy won't marry a girl if they don't love her, unless he is a gay..or he has a motives. They just need to talk and listen to each other. For the question if they will keep their relationship and hold on to their marriage?YES! They are already married so they should stand to their decision. Nicole chose to be married to Chad despite of Chad's attitude. And marriage is sacred, she just have to do something in order to save their relationship. It's not yet too late to save their relationship. They just need to talk and listen to each other. Then after that..forgive and forget. Nicole should forgive Chad and give him a chance. Everybody deserves to have a second chance..3rd,4th,5th..actually many chance as long as the heart can endure.
Jackylou D. Hinacay
AB-English 4
Lit. Crit.
Trust, time, honesty, communication and loyalty are components of love and relationship...without them I guess love is useless and relationship won't succeed. In relationship it's not enough that only one will fight it should be both. A one sided relationship will surely fail.
I admire Nicole for being so brave..I can't believe she survive for 5 years in that kind of relationship..and I can't imagine myself to be in that situation. When we love, make sure to love our self first...you are not capable of loving someone if you don't know how to love yourself. We should left something to our self so that if our someone special will leave us, we can move on and live again simply because we love our self.
Communication is very much important in a relationship. And it is so obvious that Nicole and Chad don't have this. Having a communication makes my past relationship longer. I am the kind of person who will not just keep quiet when I am hurting. I always tell the people I love the things that can hurt me or if what he is doing makes me hurt. Nicole should tell Chad what she felt about their relationship. She should not keep quite and endure all the pain. She should have done this along time ago..when they are not yet married. She should have told her about her fears, pain and needs. She should have told Chad about his mistakes and what he had failed to do. She should have told him frankly that if she really love her then show it, let her feel it and if not then let her go because she's dying in pain because of what he is doing. In short. They need a heart to heart to talk.
If I were Chad...he should be honest to Nicole, if he love her he should show it. Chad should give time to Nicole and his son. Words is not enough, action is not enough in showing our love, it should be both. He should give the emotional needs of Nicole. I guess he loves Nicole because he marry her. A guy won't marry a girl if they don't love her, unless he is a gay..or he has a motives. They just need to talk and listen to each other. For the question if they will keep their relationship and hold on to their marriage?YES! They are already married so they should stand to their decision. Nicole chose to be married to Chad despite of Chad's attitude. And marriage is sacred, she just have to do something in order to save their relationship. It's not yet too late to save their relationship. They just need to talk and listen to each other. Then after that..forgive and forget. Nicole should forgive Chad and give him a chance. Everybody deserves to have a second chance..3rd,4th,5th..actually many chance as long as the heart can endure.
Jackylou D. Hinacay
AB-English 4
Lit. Crit.
oditiMarriage was never easy. It is one of the toughest challenge of life which the story is trying to picture-out.
As we all know Nicole is madly in love with Chad while Chad seems to have lost his feelings towards Nicole. He is a good provider to his family but lacks time to reach out to them. Actually, I can relate this story to my past experience with how our love became unhealthy, the difference is just I’m not yet engaged neither married.
If I am placed in Nicole’s shoe, I would rather break up the relationship even though I’m madly in love with Chad and although we had already been blessed with a child. I do not see a strong reason to keep the relationship specially that it’s not working anymore. I am just being practical about the possible outcome if I will choose to hold on our marriage. For me, it is useless to continue the relationship which is clearly dying and will no longer progress. It is unfair to the side of Nicole because how many years they have spent together the feelings and emotions showed by Chad is still the same because feelings are best expressed through words, and when it comes to love, you must say it with all your emotions. The heartfelt thoughts and innermost feelings need to be conveyed. Don’t shy away from saying that you love, even if you have done a million times before. The best way to ignite the fire of love from the beginning again, there is a much deeper significance of love than it appears. Expressing the heartfelt thoughts is the only thing that we need to do to keep love alive. In this story, I strongly go for ending it if Chad still continues to be passive.
If I were Chad, I will not remain passive and unmindful of Nicole's dilemma but I’d rather talk to Nicole to clarify things if our relationship is still working and I will talk to her sincerely & honesty about my feelings so that there is clear explanation why I acted that way.
If I were Nicole & Chad it’s better for them to separate just for awhile for them to think what is really the status of their relationship if they missed each other, that’s the time that they will settle their relationship so that Nicole will not suffer her emotional feelings towards Chad and talk heartily, if they want to continue or not, it is not easy to hold on the relationship especially Chad is already fall out of love to Nicole because I have known men as one word people, if they said it they really meant it.
I guess this story shows the importance of give and take in a relationship, valuing your partner, and the essence of being faithful to one another.
~Clairvy B. Torayno
Every couple has different personalities, which they never knew before marriage and both decided with their own volition to plunge in to marriage to live together as one. Marriage life is viewed as happy companionship which to be enjoyed by the couple by way of making public confession to live together in sickness or in health, for poorer or richer, and said “till death do us part. (quote:RPT,04)
I believe that Nicole and Chad are in love with each other because they tend to confessed it in front of the church and of the people. They take their vow to love and to hold their marriage no matter what. If Nicole and Chad knew the meaning and essence of what they did in the altar and exchange vows, they should know their responsibilities as husband to her wife and as wife to his husband.Nicole knew before she and Chad decided to get married that Chad is the type of person that is not sweet, romantic, or caring. But in spite of that she still let herself to be part of Chad. In this situation, in the first place, Nicole knew already the weaknesses of her husband. Nicole should accept the kind of husband she had and remain to be a faithful wife to him and hold on to their commitment. With regards to Chad, a husband is always the protector of his wife, he will be the one to love and care for his family. In Ephesians 5:22, 28-31 "Husbands, love your wife as Christ also loved the church and gave himself for it . . . So ought men to love their wives as their own bodies. He that loveth his wife loveth himself. For no man ever yet hated his own flesh but nourisheth and cherisheth it, even as the Lord the church . . . For this cause shall a man leave his father and mother and shal1 be joined unto his wife, and they two shall be one flesh". with this passage of the bible the two person cannot be separated anymore if they become one. Therefore, the relationship and marriage of Chad and Nicole will remain as one and strong in the presence of emotions, feelings,struggles, attitudes and imperfect personalities. They said, to those who experience marriage, that even how long you and your partner spend your life together, their are still new attitudes that you do not know about him/her. Life is a cycle, it will always change and people will tend to change because of the situation.But what is interesting is that no matter how life and situation change you know that you two are strong and will always be one in the presence of God and people. I just do hope if Nicole and Chad are still in the presence of thinking to hold or not their relationship, they must think the first time they met and feel the first love that they feel in the fist place. I suggest that they will watch also the movie in titled "Fireproof".This is really a great movie and they really can relate on it.
..good evening maam..if I were on the shoes of Nicole I will find time to talk with my husband and air to him my concerns because I do believe that there are conflicts that cannot be solve by proper communication.And if I were Chad I were also do the same I will as forgiveness for all my shortcomings not only to my wife but also to my son.As a couple they should also consider the feeling of their son because to have a broken family will cause to much damage on the part of their son. PAMELA PAUG BSED-3 Lit.Crit.
The problem is Communication! Most couples know this to be true. I believe most couples do want to have an open, honest and transparent communication with their partner. However, proactive communication is tricky at the best of times. Over the long haul, it gets muddled with couple shorthand, ego landmines and eyes glazing over when certain topics are brought up.
Communicating effectively doesn’t have to be difficult it just takes both people committed to making it work. The problem usually lies with how to start the process.
Therefore, i can say that both partners should learn how to do proactive communication.. not just by understanding it, put a heart on it! =D
love you bhe!
Jackielou Dailo L.
BSED-3
Lit-Crit
The problem is Communication! Most couples know this to be true. I believe most couples do want to have an open, honest and transparent communication with their partner. However, proactive communication is tricky at the best of times. Over the long haul, it gets muddled with couple shorthand, ego landmines and eyes glazing over when certain topics are brought up.
Communicating effectively doesn’t have to be difficult it just takes both people committed to making it work. The problem usually lies with how to start the process.
Therefore, i can say that both partners should learn how to do proactive communication.. not just by understanding it, put a heart to it! =D
love you bhe!
Jackielou Dailo L.
BSED-3
Lit-Crit
1 Corinthians 13:4-7
“Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered; it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes; always perseveres”. The qualities of a good marriage is that to have a good communication, to be ready to forgive and to be ready to ask an apology for any mistakes or actions you may have directed at your wife or husband. As husband and wife, you will both dwell on each other’s good qualities and say any lovable and complimentary words that will bring out the best of you rather than criticize each other.
For me, if I were Nicole, I would talk to Chad sincerely about the problem because I am a person that can’t sleep if I had something in my mind such as problems in a relationship that wasn’t fixed. It should be settled out before the day will end considering that we had a child.
If I were Chad, I would show the love to Nicole what she showed to me to have fairness in our relationship because it is better to work both partners like the quotation goes “two is better than one”. If I’ve done something wrong to Nicole I will apologize to her and I will promise that it will not happen again in order to have peace in our family. I will tell her that I love her, she makes me happy and I am thankful that God gave me a person like her that has good qualities than the other women. I will show to Nicole and to my child that they are very important to me because they gave me happiness, love and strength in working as a role of father and as a husband to my wife Nicole.
If I were Nicole or Chad I will keep the relationship and I will hold on to our marriage because I do believe that there’s a solution to that certain problem and since we started good. For me it is just a trial in order to become strong enough to handle relationship like being married. A problem is a chance for us to do our best. So, there’s no need for us to be afraid to the possibilities that might come into our lives.
Though a person has a possession but he or she lacks the affection, care and love of his or her love one and with less communication, it will ends up with a mess at the end and there’s a possibility that you and your partner will broke up. Before anything else, put God in the center of your relationship because he will help you in times of difficulties and trials in your marriage life. He will lead the way to you both. The most important thing in a marriage is for both to have faith in God & Jesus Christ! When you have faith, everything is possible!
Sophia Elena S. Abecia
BSED-3
Lit.Crit
“Love is an emotion of strong affection and personal attachment. In philosophical context, love is a virtue representing all of human kindness, compassion, and affection. Love is central to many religions, as in the Christian phrase, "God is love" or Agape in the Canonical gospels. Love may also be described as actions towards others (or oneself) based on compassion, or as actions towards others based on affection.”
If i were Nicole, i rather do "genuine dialogue" with my husband. I should not let it go for some reason, we have been together for a long time.
They should bear in mind that they have entered marriage and it is not a game to easily say that it is over. I should remember that my husband loved me and that we have a child. I will confront my husband as to why do i feel something strange. I could not lose the marriage and destroy it. Our child will suffer for the rest of the years.
Conflicts are inevitable. You just have to be strong and determined. Conflicts in relationships are just "spices", they just make your menu tasteful. Sometimes its too salty, sometimes its too spicy, but surely you will find the real ingredient to make the food delicious.
>>>>>JOHN POMPEY POPAI E. ALMONIA
BSED-3
LITERARY CRITICISM
For me, the text is best analyzed through reader's-response approach especially that I am a married person. Marriage is the process by which two people who love each other make their relationship official, and permanent. Getting married is no joke. Over the course of the relationship, a lot of things happen. The couple will both experience happiness and sadness. Over the years, personalities seem to change and age become older. Conflict is always present everywhere and married life is not an exemption. What makes the relationship last is a matter of how the couple handle the inevitable problems that arise.
If I were Nicole, confrontation would be the best means to solve the problem. It would be nice to ask Chad about the real score of the relationship. I should ask him to discuss things out like the reasons of his passivity towards me. I believe that the situation can be solved through a sincere talk. We should not immediately resort to separation and the like before we have talked to our partner.
In marriage also, a lot of tests are given. So, it is a challenge for the couple like Chad more especially to Nicole to be a bridge over troubled water. Problem is always a part and parcel of life. The most important thing here is for a wife to equip herself with the value of consistency and persistence to sustain the relationship. But, if things get worst to the maximum level, probably it would be best to decide whether to continue living with him or not.
Generally, for most, married life is always a big challenge for women.
For me, the text is best analyzed through reader's-response approach especially that I am a married person. Marriage is the process by which two people who love each other make their relationship official, and permanent. Getting married is no joke. Over the course of the relationship, a lot of things happen. The couple will both experience happiness and sadness. Over the years, personalities seem to change and age become older. Conflict is always present everywhere and married life is not an exemption. What makes the relationship last is a matter of how the couple handle the inevitable problems that arise.
If I were Nicole, confrontation would be the best means to solve the problem. It would be nice to ask Chad about the real score of the relationship. I should ask him to discuss things out like the reasons of his passivity towards me. I believe that the situation can be solved through a sincere talk. We should not immediately resort to separation and the like before we have talked to our partner.
In marriage also, a lot of tests are given. So, it is a challenge for the couple like Chad more especially to Nicole to be a bridge over troubled water. Problem is always a part and parcel of life. The most important thing here is for a wife to equip herself with the value of consistency and persistence to sustain the relationship. But, if things get worst to the maximum level, probably it would be best to decide whether to continue living with him or not.
Generally, for most, married life is always a big challenge for women.
Katrina Isabel A. Alo
BSED-E3
Literary Criticism
For me, the text is best analyzed through reader's-response approach especially that I am a married person. Marriage is the process by which two people who love each other make their relationship official, and permanent. Getting married is no joke. Over the course of the relationship, a lot of things happen. The couple will both experience happiness and sadness. Over the years, personalities seem to change and age become older. Conflict is always present everywhere and married life is not an exemption. What makes the relationship last is a matter of how the couple handle the inevitable problems that arise.
If I were Nicole, confrontation would be the best means to solve the problem. It would be nice to ask Chad about the real score of the relationship. I should ask him to discuss things out like the reasons of his passivity towards me. I believe that the situation can be solved through a sincere talk. We should not immediately resort to separation and the like before we have talked to our partner.
In marriage also, a lot of tests are given. So, it is a challenge for the couple like Chad more especially to Nicole to be a bridge over troubled water. Problem is always a part and parcel of life. The most important thing here is for a wife to equip herself with the value of consistency and persistence to sustain the relationship. But, if things get worst to the maximum level, probably it would be best to decide whether to continue living with him or not.
Generally, for most, married life is always a big challenge for women.
Katrina Isabel A. Alo
BSED-E3
Literary Criticism
For me, the text is best analyzed through reader's-response approach especially that I am a married person. Marriage is the process by which two people who love each other make their relationship official, and permanent. Getting married is no joke. Over the course of the relationship, a lot of things happen. The couple will both experience happiness and sadness. Over the years, personalities seem to change and age become older. Conflict is always present everywhere and married life is not an exemption. What makes the relationship last is a matter of how the couple handle the inevitable problems that arise.
If I were Nicole, confrontation would be the best means to solve the problem. It would be nice to ask Chad about the real score of the relationship. I should ask him to discuss things out like the reasons of his passivity towards me. I believe that the situation can be solved through a sincere talk. We should not immediately resort to separation and the like before we have talked to our partner.
In marriage also, a lot of tests are given. So, it is a challenge for the couple like Chad more especially to Nicole to be a bridge over troubled water. Problem is always a part and parcel of life. The most important thing here is for a wife to equip herself with the value of consistency and persistence to sustain the relationship. But, if things get worst to the maximum level, probably it would be best to decide whether to continue living with him or not.
Generally, for most, married life is always a big challenge for women.
Katrina Isabel A. Alo
BSED-E3
Literary Criticism
the story was all about the fading love of the two person named nicole and chad.as i read this story, i felt tha sadness that nicole experienced. his husband is very passive in terms if his emotions and actions. if i were nicole, i think i have the right to talk and confront chad about the feelings that he felt for nicole as his wife. it is so confusing if chad and nicole were just have to live together in the same roof and they dont even know if their relationship is working or not.i know that it is hard for nicole to accept the fact that there is something wrong and there were changes happened in her love one. but, knowing all those things that the love that she felt before from chad in those previous years that the love that they were together is already fading and dead!!! above all this, the commitment between nicole and chad is being strenghtened by their son. i think, it will be better for them to talk for the sake of their relationship, and for their son.
EVELYN R. HORNALES
BSED
"Sometimes you love, something so much that it hurts to leave it, but you must. Sometimes it hurts too much to hold on to that thing you love. And sometimes you let go of what you love because it hurts, but then just sometimes... you get it back and live happily ever after."
like what Nicole did, because of his love to chad she insist even thought she already feel about chad's love for her,sometimes Love is not always those happy moments which can be cherished throughout life. Love sometimes (though very rarely) causes grief and pain this is also for Nicole's side like in their situation that they are already married but then chad's feeling is likely fading that he don't want to hurt Nicole but the problem is still there, cause in this case Nicole will still feel the pain. sometimes it's not really the money that will make the couple happy but it's the presence of being a husband and father to your family because If a man truly wants to communicate with his wife(family), he must enter his world of emotions.
if we say marriage their is really a big responsibility you should be honest. I'm not talking here about telling each other everything you think or feel. I'm talking about honesty in the first promise of your marriage-a commitment to stay together for life. When I hear of some people who are getting married after two or three divorces I want to grab the other person and say, "Wake up! This guy has proven himself to be a liar." I think it was Ross Perot who would not hire a divorced person for a management position because they had a proven record of dishonesty. Even for selfish reasons both parties of the contract should do their utmost to live up to it. Don't give the other person the opportunity to tell the world you were a liar. Be committed to making your vows stick.
i admire Nicole for being so brave and also to chad for being a good provider to his family but not as a good father in terms of his emotion towards to his family
..i think for me the best text approach here is the reader's response, because even though not all of us experience marriage or this kind of situation but still we can relate to it because as a reader we can easily response if will going to read it through to our emotion and deep understanding about what we going to read.
Marisa V. Pagara
AB-ENG.4
In this Essay my approach to use is the Reader Response Approach.
The story about love which everybody's experience with it.I i were be Nicole I will show to Chad my love, care and the importance of him in her life. It is better also that two of them will talk heartily whatever be the problem either it will be painful or not. Chad also will speak if his love to Nicole Fades away he should be frank even though it is painful to Nicole at least she can overcome with it.
As based on my experienced in the past when I had a 4 years relationship and here's come the time that the guy love to me fades away and I really love him. I've done everything to save the relationship but it haven't work and the speak up to me that he found somebody and his love to me was fades away.I'm very desperate at that time.Imagine that I am ! month pregnant. It is really hard to accept but despite of all those things happened I've overcome with it.
Same with Nicole if She will do everything just to hold on the marriage and Chad will not it wouldn't work.
''therefore don't force the things that can't be you re's''
SHERRYL NABAJO-RODRIGUEZ
BSED-4
Whenever you're in conflict with someone, there is one factor that can make the difference between damaging your relationship and deepening it. That factor is attitude.
If I were Nicole,I should confront and ask Chad if there is something wrong with there relationship because all relationship problems stem from poor communication skills.In Chad case,he should not remain passive to Nicole & he should check and more sensitive to the feelings of others specially to Nicole,last he should find ways how to make his wife happy.
In relationship we should prepare our self of what unexpected happen & we always ready for any circumstances.We need to set our mind that having a relationship is not always happiness BUT also Sadness and trials that can test both lovers how to handle that kind of situation.
I think both of them have a problem because Nicole didn't bother how to solve her problem to Chad & when they still not married she already know for being passivity and neglectful of Chad.Ideally, a couple should discuss certain basic issues like,feeling for each other,problem for each other & attitudes before they decide to start their life together.
For me,the best text approach here is the reader's response,because all of us can easy relate the story through our individual experience.Even though, some are not yet marriage they can still do a response in the text base on there experience.
Annie Rose E.Sumaylo
AB-English 4
Lit.Crit.
we people always have this attitude of wanting to be in love to a right person and in a right time.Well,ladies and gentleman,their is nothing in this world that is perfect. The relationship of Chad and Nicole is just part of this example. I can say that Nicole and me has the same feelings towards the boy that I love.My boyfriend was so dry,as in to the point that we girls could think that they don't even care at all but as I read this book entitled "common mistakes in a relationship",now I can fully understand that boys will be boys,they care for us but not in a corny way. They care in a way that they provide all your needs,that is how they show their love to girls and we girls,we show it through our hugs and kisses and most of the words "i love you" and etc...They just need to talk to each other and have time for each other. Somewhat like,can be related to the approach of DECONSTRUCTION of the concept of being married. So their are two sides,being happy that includes being satisfied with your partner,having your own family and being responsible enough or having this disaster of not being that responsible and badly you'll end up crying. All that Chad and Nicole needs is that they must be faithful and strong,not only for both of them but also for their baby...
Jane Marie Agnes J. Perez
BSED-3
Literary Criticism
"Perfect love is rare indeed - for to be a lover will require that you continually have the subtlety of the very wise, the flexibility of the child, the sensitivity of the artist, the understanding of the philosopher, the acceptance of the saint, the tolerance of the scholar and the fortitude of the certain by Leo Buscaglia."
In accordance to the reader’s-response approach it is said to be often mistakenly believed to be a literary critical theory that allows for any interpretation of a text. Although interpretation under reader response criticism is given a wider berth than in formalist or structuralist critiques, not every interpretation is equally valid.
Reader response criticism also evaluates interpretive communities.
The text tried to imply the connotation of marriage as sacred that which a couple sign for an agreement form to make their relationship bureaucrat, everlasting and enduring till death do us part.
I do believe that a receipt of married is not a shaggy dog story since numerous things could occur. It might experience pleasure, variance and grief just like
Nicole and Chad.
Nevertheless, consensus would be the finest means to resolve the predicament.
Indeed, even if I am not married yet, I actually undergo and have some familiarity of Nicole’s occurrence in a different manner, not enormously on a couple married. I sense the sorrow within, in a fact that I am a woman too.
Thus,severance or disjointing does not be of assistance to minimize or end the crisis but rather it’s a way to be more complex.
Amelyn Bon Estrada
BSED-E3
for me ... i were Nicole it would be better to let him go..for i know his love is already died. i know marriage is sacred but how about the foundation of marriage is LOVE.. according to the song sang by kenny rankin entitled what matter most,,
It's not how long we held each other's hand
What matters is how well we loved each other
It's not how far we travelled on our way
Of what we found to say
It's not the spring you see, but all the shades of green
It's not how long I held you in my arms
What matters is how sweet the years together
It's not how many summertimes we had to give to fall
The early morning smiles we tearfully recall
What matters most is that we loved at all.
It's not how many summertimes we had to give to fall
The early morning smiles we tearfully recall
What matters most is that we loved at all.
What matters most is that we loved at all.
i always believe that were her to love and be love in return . sometimes we let go the person we love most but it doesn't mean we do not love the person for i believe letting go is not forever, it just the way to give time to yourself and giving him time to think . marriage is useless without love Because of love we learn to respect and understand each other especially married people composed two unique individual tied to be one. Nicole deserve to be happy.
Mirra Ladaran-Jumarito
Love is always a two-way process. It must not serve just one but it works with two and only with two. Just any other relationship it is effective when you and your partner compliments with each other, show respect with each other, empathize with each other and be vocal with each other.
In the story that lies between Chad and Nicole symbolizes a typical problematic relationship where the other (Chad) shows the passivity though the girl (Nicole) presents an active response and an everlasting love towards his partner though he just can’t see the point of doing these.
The beginning part shows the very reason why they have the conflict in a relationship. An eighteen-year old girl and a nineteen-year old boy will somehow explicit early and sudden strange of the really essence of a love that’s true. With this kind of age most of the bachelors like Chad will explore and discover new things and will not stick their selves to anything. For girls they are more likely to be contented to someone and will never look for someone and that is true for most in the status quo.
Though it shows the support of Chad, as what all husband and fathers are naturally doing that is to be responsible, to Nicole but the emotional sustainability was rarely felt by her.
The story is just presenting two different characters that will clash at the middle and will be solved not by continuing the characteristics that they are possessing but by having a solution which represents the third party or the arbitration. The result will just end with two – the positive and the opposite which makes a coin a double-sided.
>>>John Pompey Popai E. Almonia
Final Analysis...
BSED-3
If I were Nicole, I should talk to Chad and express whatever feeling I have because a relationship without interaction and communication will not work the way the person wanted it to be. It is not an excuse that if one is not that vocal then that person could not let the person he loves feel that she is wanted and loved. It is also not advisable that we bypass
situations since if one experience the same problem and if it is not solved then it will follow and will get worst after wards. it is not good to keep burdens inside. we as humans need to let it out, sometimes, cry it out because there are different types of people so we should also consider how we approach them. we should not be confident that the other person loves us for LOVE is never enough for someone to stay. It needs time, communication, efforts, understanding, patience, sacrifices, courage and prayers for the relationship to be fruitful. Love is both an action and a feeling. The action of love generates a blissful feeling. When the action stops, the blissful feeling is replaced with pain. that's what Nicole felt the love was replaced with pain when Chad acts like he doesn’t love her that much. When we love the person, we should Say it. When we say the words "I Love You", they should carry with them the desire to show someone that we love them.we make sure we really mean it and are willing to do anything for that special person. words are not enough it must have actions to let the person see and feel how much the person loves him. we should Empathize. Put ourself in someone else's shoes. Rather than impose one's expectations or attempt to control them, to understand how they feel, where they come from, and who they are. Realize how they could also love you back just as well. in this case, Chad should emphatize and should not remain passive and unmindful in Nicole's Dillemma. It should also be considered that there are emotional needs of women that a man should cope up.In their case, we must not judge or put the blame to chad for being passive because it is also Nicole's fault for she let the years bypass by not telling Chad about her feelings in their relationship.Expect nothing in return. That doesn't mean we should allow someone to mistreat or undervalue us. It means that giving love does not guarantee receiving love. Try loving just for the sake of love. Realize that someone may have a different way of showing his or her love for you; do not expect to be loved back in exactly the same way.. He lavished her with gifts and presents everytime he comes home but he could not feel Chad's presence even when she's holding his hands. because the expectation of the other was material things are not important to her but for chad it is one way of showing something for her. Two people could never be the same, there will always be a difference but the love binds us, we should Realize that the relationship can be lost. If we realize that we can lose the one we love, then we have a greater appreciation of what we have. Think how lucky we are to have someone to love..I will keep the relationship since marriage is
a social contract between two individuals that unites their lives legally, economically and emotionally. so with this definition Chad lacks the emotional aspect in providing his wife the emotional needs. I will keep the relationship since i love the guy if i were Nicole. and also for the sake of the child since he will be affected sooner or later as he grow up since in this world, we are surrounded with the criticisms of others..My basis or saying all of this was due to the experience of my past relationship wherein the scenario was like with Nicole and Chad the only difference is that we are not married.what i did was quit before its too late since we are not yet married. i feel tired and i cant pretend that i am still happy i still love the person but its like i can always question is it worth fighting for?so it just end as simple as that but hard to forget.
Mary Lalainne Q. Pacto
A.B English 4
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